Saturday, March 28, 2009

It Arrived Yesterday!

The story about a ship wedged in the Panama Canal barely caught my attention as I scanned the transportation headlines. Those of us who make our living writing about the plight of the airlines, the indignities suffered by the business traveler, and the sound a million business travel industry jobs make as they disappear down the crapper are generally hard to impress when it comes to developments in the shipping news. Yet there was a picture of the vessel attached to the headline. It had an incredibly familiar, though utterly unbelievable, look to it. One click brought it to the forefront of my screen.

There was the unmistakable image of a huge container ship thoroughly wedged into one of the locks of the Panama Canal -- dwarfed under a gigantic custom motorcycle seat. The ship would have cleared the waterway effortlessly, but the sides of the seat had slammed into the edges of the locks, knocking a dozen visiting dignitaries from the North Korean Peace and Harmony Ballistic Missile Commission into the water. Repeatedly clicking on the little magnifying glass made it possible to read the tag attached to the seat.

It was addressed to me.

This was my custom seat, carefully constructed so that my ass would only overhang it by an inch in each direction, being shipped by the most practical way from the west coast by the manufacturer. According to engineering experts, this may be the largest saddle ever constructed for a BMW motorcycle in the history of two-wheeled transportation. Somewhere enroute to West Chester, a picture was taken of two Little League teams, playing nine innings while sheltered against the rain under this seat.

A huge ship similar to this one wedged itself in the Panama Canal 
carrying my custom seat from the west coast.
(Photo courtesy of Wikipedia -- Click to enlarge)

The legendary comfort of the Russell Day-Long Saddle has been whispered around the campfires of my riding friends for as long as I can remember. After 12 or more hours on the road, some riders have been known to dismount, shower, and get back on the bike (while on the center stand) to get a good night’s sleep. One long-distance runner claims this saddle makes cobblestones feel like new Macadam. Another stated that his Russell Day-Long Saddle was smoother than any of his marriages. A third says he has no problem getting naked models to pose on his bike since installing a Russell Day-Long Saddle. These are the kind of recommendations that strike a chord with me. Oddly enough, they do not appear in the company’s brochure.

I have been a candidate for a custom saddle for the past three years. The aftermarket seat on my first BMW K75 was designed as an interrogation tool by the STASI (the East German Secret Police). You would sign anything after sitting on it for two hours. I sold the saddle from my second Beemer to a blacksmith, to use in hammering out horseshoes. This seat looked great, but was designed along the lines of a splitting maul, which centered right on the crack of my ass. I remember one long ride to West Virginia, when I got off the bike feeling like a split rail fence.

"Mike" at Russell Cycle Products begins the painstaking process of 
developing a seat pocket that will match the contours of my ass. 
A dedicated seat composition artist, Mike wept openly at the 
thought of sending such a beautiful seat to certain death.
(Photograph courtesy of Russell Cycle Products -- Click to Enlarge)

Yet I have taken particular notice of long-distance riders who claim their Russell seats are like catcher’s mitts for their butts. I watched as one woman dismounted and her Russell Saddle actually made a loud kissing noise as she pulled her rather shapely ass out of it. (She blushed when she realized I was watching and said, “Something, huh?” I forget my exact reply, but I remember telling her that I could do a much better job than that saddle.)

"Mike" at Russell Cycle Products carefully mounts a critical suspension 
component into my custom Russell Day-Long Saddle. Note the photograph
 of me sitting on "Fire Balls" in the upper right. Once they got past the initial
 shock of working in mega scale, the team of experts at RCP had no 
difficulty in  dealing with my dimensions.
(Photograph courtesy of Russell Cycle Products -- Click to enlarge)

I have never heard an adverse statement about these seats, and have read plenty from riders who claim these custom-built units are a delight. Many of these riders own multiple motorcycles and have Russell Day-Long seats on all of them. And the commentary is not just from the BMW crowd, but from a variety of different marque riders who have discovered that the two areas in which motorcycle manufacturers are most likely to cut corners are seats and horns.

The size of the finished seat cannot be overstated. Local township officials (above) were initially stymied as to whether or not the finished seat required a Certificate of Occupancy and an address.
(Photograph courtesy of Leslie Marsh -- Click to enlarge)


Only one thing has separated me from a Russell Day-Long Saddle before: cash. They don’t give these away. Professional writers like myself are chronically broke. While my alimony payments to a platoon of former wives have ceased (just in time for the economy to collapse), I am still supporting a distillery in Jamaica, a tobacco industry in Honduras, a pole dancer in Coatesville, and 466 whores in Washington, DC. This doesn’t leave me with much. Yet my girlfriend -- the amazingly beautiful and gentle Stiffkins -- seems to remember something nice I did for her, and presented me with a combined Christmas, Valentine’s Day, and birthday gift: my very own Russell Day-Long saddle.

Jay Scales, Mac-Pac member and a *Swiss bell-ringer I sometimes ride with, was also presented with one of these saddles by the woman in his life. We were thinking of building a monument to them, but Jay is holding out for MotoLights as well.

Ordering a saddle from Russell Cycle Products is an exacting science, requiring a number of critical photographs, vital statistics, and **character references. I decided not to lie about my weight in the event it voided the warranty. RCP required pictures of me flat-footing the bike and riding it. I had great shots of me putting “Fire Balls” through its paces at 167 mph taken by Chris Jaccarino and his girlfriend Melinda. Static pictures were taken by David Hardgrove and Matt Piechota. (All of these folks are celebrated members of the exalted Mac-Pac, the eastern Pennsylvania-based BMW Eating and Wrenching Society.) As far as character references go, I sent them the names and phone numbers of total strangers, selected from the phone book at random.

My  finished Russell Day-Long Saddle is a work of art with beautifully clean lines that will dovetail with the classic styling of the Scout Parabellum fairing on the "low seat" configuration of my 1995 BMW K75. 
The heater switch, in black, is on the other side.
(Photograph courtesy of Leslie Marsh -- Click to enlarge)

RCP’s website lists every possible seat configuration for hundreds of bikes, and each of their saddles is as unique as a set of fingerprints. (Technically speaking, this seat is an exact profile of my ass and should be accepted as legal identification at any airport in the country.) The site depicts a cross-section of the saddle’s construction, illustrating their highly innovative spring suspension, which results in unique wings to support your butt cheeks.. I believe the spring used in my seat was a leaf taken from the suspension of an Abrams battle tank. Russell does require your seat pan, which makes getting one of these saddles an ideal winter project as it will take a few weeks. Nevertheless, they don’t waste any time and have a reasonably quick turnaround.

Opening the box yesterday, my office was flooded with that new motorcycle seat smell. (I can assure you this is significantly different from the way an old motorcycle seat smells.) This scent is so stimulating that I’m thinking of ordering a suit made from the same material. (This would guarantee that I could get laid anyplace.) You have a choice of stitch patterns with these seats, and I went with the “half moon” style, which offered a clean design with fewer seams. I actually printed out each stitch pattern and looked at them up against the bike, to see which one went best with its classically beautiful lines.

The fit and finish of my new Russell Day-Long Saddle is a good match for the timeless beauty of the BMW K75 -- especially in the low seat configuration. Note heater switch.
(Photograph by the author -- Click to enlarge) 


I also ordered the optional seat heater. This is a single-setting comfort item that will take the chill out of your butt, while possibly extending the riding season when the temperature is in the mid-20s. The activating switch is located at the back of the seat. The seat came with all the electrical hardware (including an in-line fuse and directions) to connect directly to the battery. The unit will also connect cleanly through the Centech fuse box I had installed last fall.

This shot gives a better idea of how the seat actually looks on "Fire Balls."
(Photograph by the author -- Click to enlarge)

The folks at Russell Cycle Products take a keen interest in customer service and will make any reasonable effort (as defined in their guarantee) to achieve client satisfaction. I had fun chatting with them on the phone (especially with Leslie), and got them to send me pictures of my seat in construction. They are interested in how the seat and I morph to each other. I promised I’d let them know.

My daughter -- Katherine -- pronounces the new seat as "very comfortable." Then she said she wanted one. When I pointed out she had to have a motorcycle first, she mentioned she wanted one of those too. 
Kayo (my name for her) really wants a pink Vespa.
(Photograph by the author -- Click to enlarge)

The seat arrived in plenty of time for me to begin the riding season. In fact, the tons of salt and grit still lingering on the road have me dragging my feet anyway. And I regret to report that efforts to get “Fire Ball’s” exhaust system and crash bars coated black have hit a snag directly linked to the credit crisis.

“Don’t look at me,” said Stiffie. “I gave at your office.”

The are limits to a woman’s love apparently.

——————————

Author's Note: I have no affiliation with Russell Cycle Products and received neither compensation nor discount for writing about this seat.  The opinions, analogies, and humor presented in this piece are my own. I subscribe to a sophisticated writing style that elevates mild exaggeration to an art form. Some fictional license has been taken with the Panama Canal and with the assholes calling the shots in North Korea. I intended no offense to anyone in the writing of this piece. But if you came away slighted, you might want to consider working harder at becoming a better person, finding better friends, or changing your name. 

——————————
Story Notes:
*Jay Scales is an authority on church bells, public clock bells, bell castings, and the installation of carillons in some of the most impressive and historic buildings in the area. His work and that of his company is widely respected in national and international circles.
**Character references are optional.

©Copyright Jack Riepe 2009
AKA The Lindbergh Baby (Mac-Pac)
AKA Vindak8r (Motorcycle Views)
AKA The Chamberlain -- PS (With A Shrug)

52 comments:

Charlie6 said...

What a great review of this seat! I almost snorted my drink through my nose as I read about the Panama Canal debacle though!

One can tell that you are in the business of convincing people that they need to buy whatever product or idea you're paid to market.....

You daughter is very "easy on the eye", obviously takes after her mom.

Great post Jack and thanks for the pics, now get on Fireballs and tell us how it feels.

Grandad 43 said...

Jack, what can one say after reading your post but "Happy Trails"

Grandad 43
PS 14

Anonymous said...

Jack, i'm one happy Russell Day-Long camper. I've put one on every bike I've kept. Have two on right now. Unfortunately, my sqeeze didn't pay for any of them. May your butt be as happy as my butt has been on them! john in Kutztown

Cantwell said...

Dear Jack,

That seat looks awesome and very comfortable. I've seen something like it somewhere, I'm not sure.....Ah HA!...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UUSxKPbwTYY

See you soon,
Cantwell

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Charlie6 (Dom):

Aren't you kind to say so! I am delighted to have brought a smile to your face, or a snort, as the case may be. This seat is without question one of the finest accessories that I have put on this motorcycle.

But you know... I don't see it as an accessory. I see it as a necessity, if I want to ride with a greater degree of comfort.

Katherine is indeed a one-of-kind beauty. And while she has many of her mom's physical characteristics, she went with the dark side of the force and became a public relations writer. (Her mom was a reporter). I take my victories where I find them.

Thank you for reading my blog and for writing in.

Fondest regards,
Jack

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Grandad 43:

Thank you for reading my blog and dropping me a line. I'ts been two years since our path's last crossed. It's time to get together again for lunch on the Delaware again. What do you say?

Fondest regards,
Jack

Jack Riepe said...

Dear John in Kutztown:

Nice to hear from you!

Russell Cycle Products couldn't get a stronger endorsement than yours... But your story was not uncommon. I heard from another guy in Canada, and he has four bikes with four of these saddles on them too!

How come our paths haven't crossed yet? I'm going to be headed in and out of Kutztown a few times these season. We should ride together at least once.

Fondest regards,
Jack

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Michael Cantwell:

You bastard.

I went to the site you indicated and laughed like hell. Well done, Mike. Let's see how funny things are when you head down this way and I get to write about it.

Fondest regards,
Jack

BMW-Dick said...

Jack:
Now we just have to get your dumb ass in that snazzy new seat and do some riding.

PS Katherine Ann looks lots better on the bike than you do, but you and anyone with working eyes already knows that.

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Dick:

I got up this morning, poured myself a cup of coffee, and promised I would only write nice things about you -- unless provoked.

You cannot type three words in my direction without rattling your tail.

The seat looks good. I'm going to try and get a few hours in on Fire Balls this week. I'm on the road for business the end of next week.

Fondest regards,
Jack

Baron's Life said...

Well Jack,

Time to buy Kayo a Bike... nice report...I think Russell must have paid you for this report...in spite of your disclaimer...lol
great post...let's see if you can get a naked model pose on it...

cpa3485 said...

Congratulations on the new seat!!

Looks like a wonderful Ass-essory.

May it give you many years of comfort.

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Baron's Life:

One of the proudest days of my life came when Kayo looked at me out of the tops of her eyes and said, "Hey Dad. I can pay for my own cell phone now." The day is quickly coming when my kid will be able to buy me a motorcycle.

I expect her to show up here on a Vespa anytime now. What's really cool is that she asked me if I'd go riding with her if she got one. In a heart beat.

I do not have any sponsors for this blog, as much as I would like to have a dozen. I do have a habit of saying exactly what's on my mind, with my choice of expression, which occasionally flusters some people. As a loose cannon, I make sponsors nervous.

But I'm working on that too. I'm glad you got a laugh out of my stuff today! And I have been wondering about the naked model thing too...

Thanks for reading my trip and for writing in.

Fondest regards,
Jack
Twisted Roads

Jack Riepe said...

Dear CPA3485:

Thank you for your kind encouragement and warm sentiment. I hope this seat does the trick. I have planned one multiple day ride for each month, right through November.

I want to ride.

The arthritis is becoming more mansageable as my weight drops too. It has been raining for 24 hours now, and I have been walking (like an ourangutang out of tree) without a cane all evening.

Last November, it would be an effort for me to get to piss.

Now all this is conjecture, but I think I will be able to significantly contribute to my riding club's mileage total's this year.

Our paths may cross yet.

Thanks for reading my blog and writing in.

Fondest regards,
Jack

Anonymous said...

Dear Jack:

I very much enjoyed your article! Your word-smithing talents and subject-matter knowledge often leaves me wanting more.

In this specific article, I could not help noticing the picture of your daughter, Katherine. I can't recall seeing any pictures of you, but after seeing this photo of Katherine, I can only surmise that you are likely a cross between Pierce Brosnan and Richard Gere.

Sincerely,
Steve Makohin

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Steve:

I can see that it would hard to to put one over on you. The truth is that many people call me Pierce Gere because of the similarities I bear to both actors.

Not only does Katherine get her good looks from me, but she is a professional writer as well.

Thank you for your kind remarks regarding my writing style. I switched on the "reading" capability of the computer, and it read your line to me about my wordsmithing -- continously, for four hours.

Thank you for reading my blog and writing in.

Fondest regards,
Jack

682202 said...

Jack,

I know you will enjoy your new Russell seat. Mine is 10 years old with some where between 30 - 40K on it. My wife and I used the Russell photo as proof to the INS that we were not getting married just for the Green card. You are a lucky man to have your Lady purchase it for you.

I have never been able to convince any naked lady's to pose on it, but maybe I'm hanging out in the wrong places..

GAW

Joe said...

Jack,

Nice story. I have never heard a bad thing about a Russell seat and you did not break the trend.

One question. What was the key hanging out for that is next to the front brake lever?

Ride Safe,

joe

Jack Riepe said...

Dear 68202:

I am so looking forwad to putting on the miles with this seat. I've wanted one of these for the longest time. And while I am thrilled that Siffie got me this seat as a gift, I'm puzzled about one thing.

When she gave it to me, Stiffie said, "Now you will be gone for months at a time as soon as you put this seat on the bike, right?"

What do you think she meant by that?

Gordon, thanks for reading my blog and writing in. I hope this seat gives me 50,000 like yours gave you! By the way, I loved your profile.

Fondest regards,
Jack

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Joe:

Thank you for reading my blog and writing in. You certainly are observant about the key. There is a Ram mount for a GPS just behind the fairing at that point. The mount has a knob to adjust or remove the GPS cradle. The knob locks in with a key. Locked out, it will just spin freely, making in more difficult for someone to steal the mount.

It's always a pleasure, Joe.

Fondest regards,
Jack

Anonymous said...

There is no way that your ass fits
in that seat, especially If your daughter(nice small butt) can sit on it and not look like a prairie dog peering from its hole. I think you need to send it back and have it enlarged by a factor of at least 3X.

Best of luck on your new Acquisition.

Clyde

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Clyde:

I knew someone would draw that conclusion... I just didn't think it would be you. My ass is getting smaller every day.

Thank you for having the balls to say what everyone else is thinking. I should have known. Thank you alsofor reading my blog and kicking me in the balls.

The Wst Virginia ride can't come soon enough.

Fondest regards,
Jack

Rogers George said...

Jack, I always read your blog! I even subscribed (something I recommend to anyone who doesn't want to miss any of your humor (btw--you are the only writer who makes my wife laugh out loud (and she just subscribed))) --Oh, and it's splitting maul, not mall. I know because I have one. I've heard good things about the Russel seat, too, but I'm pretty satisfied with my Corbin.

Tena said...

Nice to see that the Panama Canal Incident did not stop your saddle from completing the journey to your house. Hope the two of you have many many memorable adventures.

Mike O said...

Jack, I am very interested in hearing your feedback after you log some miles on that seat. I also suffer from the BMW stock seat syndrome (as opposed to Stockholm Syndrome) despite trying sheepskin, gel pads, and a variety of other "ass saving" products. Perhaps I can get Marta to buy a Russell for "us" since she logs a good percentage of the same miles I do on the RT.

Good luck!
Mike

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Rogers:

Thank you for reading my blog, subscribing to it, and recommending that others do so too. Reading my blog often, along with a diet rich in oats, will lower your blood pressure.

I changed the spelling of the word "mall" to"maul, as you noted. I have great hopes for this seat and plan to report on it throughout the summer.

Fondest regards,
Jack

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Tena:

Thank you fior the warm sentiment. This seat should make it possible for me to ride longer distances in less pain this season. Which is good, as I plan to be out on the road a lot.

Plus, it really makes my K75 look very snazzy. And that's important too.

Thanks again for writing in. How comw I never hear from Mr. Cupcake?

Fondest regards,
Jack

sweetkfva@peoplepc.com said...

Jack: Again I'm pissing myself and my dog reading your blog. Tiggers gettin pissed. I credit your courage in putting your lovely daughters picture in for all the old bastards like me to oogle. At your current rate of weight loss won't this seat be to big by summer?Hope to meet you in Johnson City this summer.

Niteowl said...

Jack, Now you should have nothing but a happy tail. My air seat made the long rides much easier.
Are you planning to go to the BuRP rally? Lucy and I plan on going.

Great post, as always.

Have a Marvelous day,
Wayne

Tena Cupcake said...

Hi, Jack. Mr Cupcake doesn't feel like being social very much. He hardly ever posts anymore, unless it is to cause trouble in certain forums.

I was hoping to say something "smart" in my original post, like: how bad to find out your new saddle was the seat of the Panama Canal problem! Hope that wasn't the butt of TOO many jokes.... but I just don't think of these things in a timely fashion. Ah, well.

Ron says "Hi."

Mr. Cupcake said...

Jack
That's a fine looking seat ya got there. The one on the bike looks good too.

Canajun said...

Jack, good story, but don't you find a seat that big makes the Beemer a tad top-heavy?

Jack Riepe said...

Dear SweetFVA@peoplepc.com:

I'm glad you and your dog both got something out of my last piece. I try to write for the masses. The picture of Kayo on my bike was too cute to pass up, so into the blog it went. I am losing weight every day, but not fast enough to make the kind of difference I was hpoing to. Besides, if I get enough of the beef off to have thr seat reconstructed, then I'll be delighted to pay for it.

Thanks for reading my tripe and for writing in.

Fondest regards,
Jack

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Niteowl (Wayne):

You'll be getting a call from me today. I need your address to mail this friggin flashlight. If you resd this before you get my call, respond on my e-mail.

I remember the cushy nature of that huge seat you had. This one is something like that, but with a steel girder inside it to prop up my huge ass.

I am seriously thinking of the BuRP rally this year. Hopefully, I can get away.

Thanks for reading and writing in.
Fondest regards,
Jack

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Tena:

It's never too late to fire a shot in the Twisted Roads comments section. You just have to remember to duck the instant you pull the trigger.

Thank you for being a loyal reader and for chiming in.

Fondest regards,
Jack

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Mr. Cupcake:

You're starting to make me nervous.

Fondest regards,
Jack

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Canajun:

The K75 was top heavy from the day I got it. It is a tall bike with all of the gracefulness of the Chrysler building on wheels -- when you're trting to move it around in the garage. Put the power to this piece of art work and it weights nothing, maneuvers like a dream, and leans to 45º in the curves.

I can assure you that nothing makes this rig top heavy like my fat ass!

Thank you for writing in and for reading my triope.

Fondest regards,
Jack

Breakfast VP said...

OK, we've washed the salt off the roads for ya. All clear. Ta'ell with that phoo phoo foo exhaust coating. Put that bike back together and ride it.
Phoo phoo can wait till next winter.

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Mike "O":

I'll keep you posted on how well the seat and I break in to each other. It was great having lunch with you and Marta the other day. The trick to getting a GF, SO, or spouse to buy you a Russell Day-Long Saddle is to appear to be sensitive and willing to listen. Once you get the saddle, you can go back to normal.

Thanks for reading my blog and writing in.
Fondest regards,
Jack

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Breakfast VP (Todd):

I found another way to get the chrom changed over to black. Should take only a few days.

I'm sorry I am going to miss the gassing day festivities.

Thanks for reading and writing in.

Fondest regards,
Jack

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Breakfast VP (Todd):

I found another way to get the chrom changed over to black. Should take only a few days.

I'm sorry I am going to miss the gassing day festivities.

Thanks for reading and writing in.

Fondest regards,
Jack

bobskoot said...

Jack:
It's about time that your ship finally came in. GET THAT SADDLE mounted and Head WEST.

and bring Katherine !

bob
bobskoot: wet coast scootin

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Bobskoot:

Will do.

Fondest regards,
Jack

bobskoot said...

Jack:
That looks like a great seat. It looks really comfy. I've never seen a real one before. The other day, I was just thinking how nice it would be to have a heated seat. You could probably extend your riding season by two months, along with other heated gear to go with it.
I hope that switch is in a location where you can't actually hit it by accident. OH OH, I just thought of something . . . Your switch is hot wired directly to your battery (as I recall you wrote). Is there any way to switch the wiring to go on and off with your ignition switch instead ? Otherwise you may have a tired battery one day by accident.

bob
bobskoot: wet coast scootin

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Bob Skoot:

The seat will be connected to the Centech fuse panel and can only be powered when the engine is running. I will know if the seat has gone on accidently, as the seat will get hot. But there wil also be a fast disconnect. between the seat and the fuse box. In thesummer months, the sea will not be connected at all.

Furthemore, I took the precaution of hooking up an LED voltmeter on, which will give me a readout of the actually alternator is actually doing. I can swith stuff off if the voltmeter drops. My alternator puts out 50 amps.

Thank you for aaking a technical question.

Fondest regards,
Jack

Conchscooter said...

You are nauseating when you are happy.
If you ever do come to Key West I will talk to the traffic division about getting you an oversized permit for Duval Street. They cost one Russell seat (Bonneville model) each.

John said...

Jack, the new seat looks great. I hope that this means you will be out and about more and getting more writing material.

Jack Riepe said...

Dear Conch:

Thank for your kind note dated Match 31, 2009. Your correspondence is important to us, and received the greatest consideration from our Mumbai-based customer service department. Your questions and observations will be answered as quickly as possible.

In the meantime, we must discourage sitting around with your hand on your ass waiting for any kind of a reply that could be must construed as "useful."

No matter how you slice it, this is a comfy seat. Hah! Eat your heart out. I wish it came in alligator hides. (Actually, that would be cool.) It is doubtful that either this seat nor I (in my present form) could fit down Duval Street.

Thank you for writing in and for leaving a comment.

Fondest regards,
Jack

Jack Riepe said...

Dear John C.:

Thank you for your kind sentiment. I am going to miss gassing day for work reasons, but I do hope to be out a week from this Saturday. My goal is 500 miles every weekend. My legs feel beeter and I am getting lighter.

The open road is calling me...

And thank you for reading my blog.

Fondest regards,
Jack

irondad said...

One thing I did not see was the large air horn. It's been a while since I looked, but I'm pretty sure the rule still applies.

Any barge as large as your seat ( take your pick ) has to be equipped with a horn.

I'm sure we'll be relegated by a post in the near future about how you are going through menopause. As evidenced by repeated episodes of being too hot then too cold.

It probably won't actually be menopause, of course. We'll know it's because you wired your own heated seat switch.

Hopefully you put a proper fuse in there. "Fire Balls" could take on more than one meaning!

With tongue in cheek affection,

Dan

Jack Riepe said...

Dear IronDad;

I'm glad you mentioned the horn. Once the black powder-coated crash bars are re-installed, a Steble/Nautilus compact air horn will be suspended from a backet that normally attaches flashing lights.

And just for the record, my ass runs hot and cold all the time. But the rest of me glows like a red hot rivet right out of the fire. I may be fat, but I'm wirey.

Always a pleasure, IronDad.I hope our paths cross eventually.

Fondest regards,
Jack

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